Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Cyclops As an Expert in Laser Hair Removal

Scott Summers, otherwise known as Cyclops, is widely understood as the leader of the X-Men. Cyclops first made his appearance in X-Men #1 which debuted in September of 1963. One of the original X-Men developed by creators Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, Cyclops' main power is his ability to emit an incredibly strong optic blast from his eyes controlled through a mask and other eye wear that covers Scott Summers' eyes. As a result, Cyclops can destroy buildings, machinery, or large robotic sentinels in a fiery demolition. With controllable technology, Cyclops can make precise laser cuts through glass or other metals which would have made him perfect given a need for laser hair removal.

Several of the X-Men are incredibly hairy. Take for example, Beast, a professor who, after a chemical accident, now lives and breathes as a blue-haired primate-like animal with hair that covers his entire body. If he ever needed a trim or precision laser hair removal, Scott Summers could have easily obliged. Take Wolverine for another example, notorious for his burly chest and mutton chops. If Wolverine and Cyclops were ever caught in the desert together, Scott Summers could easily give him a trim to not only keep cool in a desert climate, but to keep his mutton chops perfectly even.

Nightcrawler, Gambit, and even the young Jubilee may have sought out Cyclops' unique ability for beauty enhancement when not fighting other villains. Although Professor X was already bald, he may have also had a need for Cyclops' ability that many readers may not know about. Of course, this is entirely complete speculation, as Stan Lee has never revealed any cosmetic needs insofar as hair removal about the mutant classes. Since many fans and readers will never know, one can only speculate about the mutant need for beauty alterations involving a laser, specifically one emitting from the eyes of Cyclops.

Maybe Storm, Rogue, or his long love, Jean Grey, might call upon him for the ultimate bikini wax. With Cyclops' ability to control his laser blasts, he could have easily scored the ladies a precise laser hair removal service that they may not have otherwise been able to receive since many human businesses were skeptical of mutant customers. Had Jean Grey, his wife and long-time love, not been killed by Magneto in a later edition of the X-Men series, they could have easily retired into the laser hair removal business for mutants.

Such a shop would have been highly beneficial for mutants with super hair growth issues stemming as a byproduct of their mutant abilities. With Cyclops' unique abilities, he could have easily performed procedures for an array of mutants who required specialized waxes, shaves, trims, or complete removals. Nevertheless, this process would not have worked on Multiple Man, a mutant who, when other mutant powers were used against him, automatically created a duplicate of himself. This mutant customer would have clearly filled up Scott and Jean's laser hair removal shop to the brim.

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